Popsicle Drama on the First Day of SUMMER!!!!

LIfe-changer

A week ago I got a phone call that was a life-changer.  My dad is sick.  He needs lots of prayers.  It has been a hard week.  One day I went to the park with one of my friends and her little guy walked into the path of a swing.  The swing hit him once on the way down and then again on the way up while the lady pushing the swing tried frantically to catch it.  The little guy ended up on the ground, crying, with a big welt on his head.  I felt so bad for him (and his mom!) but that is exactly how my head has felt.  I've been struggling with a short temper, my head feeling fuzzy, my emotions being unstable, and a sincere desire to eat all the junk food I can find.  Note to self: don't buy any more junk food!  My house-hold chores are behind, we have been having the simplest food I can think to cook.  In the midst of this, I have been giving myself lots of pep talks, and I have been given lots of grace.  This is my moment to suffer well, gracefully.  I must train my will to live the always norms now.  My children don't need to suffer through this with me.  I need to be helpful and joyful for my dad.

Always Norms:
Presence of God
Consideration of your Divine Filiation
Acts of Thanksgiving
Acts of Atonement
Aspirations
Mortification
Study
Work
Order
Cheerfulness/Joy

And yet, it's so hard to watch someone I love so much suffer.  I can relate even more closely to Mary as she stood at the foot of the Cross.  Sometimes my sadness still overcomes me, but mostly I want to cherish every moment that I have with him because I will have lots and lots more.  There is no way to know how many, but this is true of everybody.  Life is a gift.  And I sure do love my Dad.

Our Annual Family Vacation, 2013

We did not have a great "stay-cation" this year.  Lots of trials and sickness and sadness.  But, we were together through it all.  If Ron hadn't been off last week I'm pretty sure I would have collapsed on Friday night.  God knew that we needed to be together for the week to get through everything as a family.  And He was so present to us in the midst of the suffering.  Being on the cross with Jesus is so hard to explain, the joy that comes from the suffering!  The fruit that comes from being united with Him.  Here are some of the bright spots in a bleak week:

MONDAY: We went to venerate the relics of St. Anthony of Padua.  Pia loved it.  There were also lots of other relics, including one from the Saint that Pia is named after.  She blew kisses to all of the relics and asked the Saints to pray for various intentions.

Dulce slept through our first trip to the relics so we had to go back after she woke up.  As we were walking back an old monk came out of an elevator and she said loudly, "Mom, is that a relic?".  Great Dulce.

A beautiful rosary walk.  It was called "The Heavenly Path".

We went to Cheesecake Factory afterwards.

Dulce kept her jumping and spilling of water tactics to a minimum.

My family loves whipped cream.  Seriously.

TUESDAY and WEDNESDAY: Dulce had a high fever and woke up screaming that the bed was "slippy slidey" or "collapsing".  She insisted on sleeping and sitting on the floor all day.  We made the best of it by painting nails and reading books while Pia and Ron gardened and ran errands and played.

Pia is my eager littler gardener.  Her current hobbies include gardening, photography, pretending to be a mom, dancing, and reading.  I can't wait to see her life unfold and the plans the God has for her!

Pia wants me to put the caption, "Pia's garden".  This section has basil, zuchinnis, tomatoes, peppers, and strawberries.  Another section has brocolli, grean beans, watermelon, and pumpkins.

 

THURSDAY: We finally took Dulce to the doctor because she started crying and telling us that her car seat was "slippy slidey" when we tried to head to Starved Rock.  The doctor said she has vertigo-no treatment except maybe anti-nausea medicine before we drive anywhere.  But he went on and on about how amazing it was that she had the ability to explain what she was feeling at her age.  He said it was fascinating!  Great.  Aunt Meg kept us entertained as we waited for the doctor by texting us a "Baby Monkey" video.  Thanks Aunt Meg, we love you and we looooooove baby monkey. 

After the doctor proclaimed that Dulce was okay, we headed to the aquarium and got to touch sting rays.  It was so amazing.

We also got to see jelly fish.  We splurged for the expensive tickets this year since we didn't stay at a hotel or really go anywhere for our vacation.

Checking out the dolphins.



Dulce still would only sleep on the floor. 

 




FRIDAY: Pia woke us up at 6:15 am with a high fever and then she spent the day sleeping on the couch or throwing up all over.  We will go to Starved Rock some other time!

The Fingerprints of the Holy Spirit in My Life

A while ago, just a regular morning, as I was driving to put my brother on the bus, the Holy Spirit made Himself very present to me.  He revealed how all the decisions that I have made as an adult person seeking to follow God's will and subsequently the decisions that Ron and I have made as a married couple seeking to do God's will have led us to this exact point.  This isn't making sense, clearly our decisions have led us to where we are now.  What I mean is that we have made lots of counter-cultural decisions to serve God and raise our family how we have discerned Him to be calling us to.  And we have been living with the resultant blessings and sacrifices and we are SO HAPPY.  Nevertheless, sometimes (but rarely) temptation and questions enter into our minds and we think "What if we had done (something) differently?!" We might have (something that we have sacrificed).  But in this moment of prayer (because yes, sometimes morning prayer does happen while attentively driving and listening to my daughters chat in the backseat) He revealed to me how all the little decisions have fit together.  That we are following His path for us.  And as with any moment when God responds powerfully to prayer, it was important in my life, in my increased fiat to our Lord and my increased joy in His will.  Some grace to continue praying, "Jesus, I trust in You" and to mean it with every part of me.  God is in control, He has a plan for my life, I need to correspond to His grace with love.

Several weeks later, I was putting my brother on the bus.  When I got to my Mom's house, JW was in the bathroom and completely undressed.  It was honestly a moment that I had been dreading.  JW is pretty disabled and needs help with his basic needs, especially wiping after going to the bathroom and bathing and shaving, etc.  My sister and I have often talked about what will happen to him when our parents pass away.  Will we care for him?  Will he go to a home?  We don't know, I'm sure God will let us know when the time comes.  But we are both not too interested in taking care of his bodily needs.  I know, that sounds terrible, but it's just the truth.  So here I was in this moment with a naked brother and then the bus arrived.  I said a prayer, cleaned him up, dressed him, and sent him off.  And you know what, it wasn't that bad!  Again, I felt the Holy Spirit at work and realized that sometimes I dread moments so much and then when it gets to the actual moment, it's not nearly as bad as I imagined it was going to be.  God gives us the grace for the present moment.  I MUST work on mortifying my imagination.  And if God calls me to care for JW in the future, I trust that He will give me the grace to do so.  AND it won't be as bad as I currently imagine.

One more God-moment, just so I have it recorded.  My birthday was last week, and again, I was dreading it.  Why?  Truly, because many of the things that I want haven't happened in my life.  I was being a baby, and wishing that I had more babies, was holier, was more in shape, etc.  The list can go on and on and on...until God intervenes and takes away my pride and self-interest.  I know that our life is very blessed and in prayer had just recently had it so powerfully confirmed that God has a plan for my life and that it is infinitely more beautiful then my plan.  Yes Lord, I believe that.  But still the dread.  And then, a good confession with some advice about humility.  GRACE!  And then, a beautiful homily about the Sacred Heart and God's intimate, radical, beautiful love for me, for each of us.  GRACE!  And finally, a homily that spoke straight to my heart and left me with goosebumps and shaky on this exact subject (God's will vs temptations from the evil one or self-interest).  GRACE!  When I received our Lord today in the Eucharist, my heart felt like it would explode with joy and gratitude and love.  I held back tears (because that's what I do) and was just so overwhelmed with God's presence in my life, at every moment.

That I may love Him more.  That is my prayer.

Party Time!

Eager to get to the party!

This weekend we had two big parties!  First we had a bridal shower for Miss Renae, who will soon become Aunt Renae when she marries Ron's brother, Patrick.  The kids had a blast playing in the yard for three hours with Ron's youngest cousins.  It was a lovely day!


My kids with the happy couple and Ron's three youngest cousins!

They liked the cards that Pia made.  Her art-work is so funny right now.  In the picture, Uncle Patrick had no arms.

M pulled my girls around the backyard in a wagon for hours.  She is wonderful.  Pia took this picture!

My little party animals taking a rest in the hammock.

Today we went to our neighbor and very good friend A's birthday party.  It was a BIG DEAL because Pia and Dulce were both invited.  (Dulce thinks she is A's best friend, just like Pia.)  The party was at Build-A-Bear and then we had pizza and cake and SODA!!!!! at Sbarros afterwards.  The kids loved it.  Ron and I had a great time, too. 



I'm a big deal big kid, goin' to a party!

Pia with one of her infamous home-made cards.

With their good friend, A!

Pia made a bunny and named it "Felice" and Dulce made a bear and named it after the birthday girl.

As we were driving home, we were talking about parties- so many parties!!! and how grateful we are for our family and friends that celebrate with us and invite us to celebrate with them.

They loved the pizza, but were really excited to have "soda" (really lemonade, but hey, it was still thrilling)!

Easter list wrap up, aka how to mortify my perfectionism.

The long and the short of it is that we didn't finish our entire Easter to-do list (which made me crazy for two days but I am over it!!!).  But it wasn't meant to be a list of things to be done just to do them, it was meant to be a celebration, being fully alive in Christ.  So we only had 6 picnics, and we visited Fr. H after Pentecost.  We only fingerpainted two times and I have a fabric pile still waiting to be sewn into tea-bags.  


But we had so many other wonderful adventures! We visited a new, FASCINATING farm with free range chickens. It was memorable-Dulce still talks about the chickens that ate her cheese and Pia still talks about the 11 piglets all nursing their mom AT ONCE! And they both still talk about getting to "pet" the baby cow. We just recently planted a garden, which the kids love! We also had a May crowning to honor Our Lady and had a balloon release to celebrate the feast of the Ascension. We finished off the Easter season with a Pentecost party.  It was a wonderful Easter season. And our summer fun list is all ready to go....


On the feast of the Ascension, our balloon release.  First we read the story of the Ascension to them...



Pia's balloon "ascending into Heaven".  The other two little girls had to be coaxed to release their balloons, and G especially regretted her decision afterwards.

Crowning Mary...

Pentecost Party!  Raspberry pie-Red for the Holy Spirit, Fire for the flames of fire, and of course the girls blew out the candles signifying the mighty wind.

Easter To-Do List:

PICNIC #3



Some New Habits

I am currently cultivating a number of habits that relate to my relationship with my children.  I am cultivating the habits in me, but they affect my children's behavior, too.  They mostly aren't the typical virtues...

1.  Presence.  I am working hard to be present to Pia and Dulce.  To listen to them and watch them, every time they ask me to.  "Mom, look at me do a summersault/twirl around/jump really high/etc." Yes, I will watch you.  I know that you will only think your jumping abilities are super cool for this short window of your life (and you are right!).  I will watch you.  I am working on being present to tickle them, read to them, smell them, rub their backs, laugh at their jokes, just be with them.  What is taking me away from being present to them?  Housework and the internet.  The first I am working to streamline or do while they are sleeping and the second I am severely limiting my time with.

2. Not being a perfectionist.  My kids hardly ever match anymore.  That's because Pia picks out both of their outfits on a regular basis, and Dulce really, really likes several pairs of pants that are hideous unmatchable.  Often, Dulce has her shoes on the wrong feet and won't let me fix them.  Whenever we do crafts, the mess is out of control.  Actually, the mess at my house is pretty much always out of control.  And you know what?  None of it matters.  They are dressed.  They are happy.  And they are getting kind of good at making random crafts.  And my perfectionist tendencies are dying a slow death.  Very slow.  And painful.  But it's a good mortification.

3. Being outside, A LOT!  Yes, they insist on it.  It's just the beginning of summer and there are gardens to plant, parks to visit, sprinklers to run through, bugs to examine, flower and leaves to pick, etc.  Being outside is fascinating for my kids!  And for me, it means work, but it's all worth it.  Bring on the sunscreen, bug spray, hose-downs, and exploration. 

4. Patience.  They move slowly.  They are curious about everything and ask lots of questions.  They are never ready when I am ready.  Dulce is in a tough stage where she has lots of fits if she can't do something, and she wants to do everything by herself.  Yes, patience.  This stage will pass quickly, too quickly really.  I want to treasure this time with them, and let them know how much I love them.

5. Smiling at them.  Seems like a strange habit to need to cultivate, but I am working on purposefully smiling at them more.  They smile a lot more, too.

Just a regular day.

Today we stopped in at Adoration to say hi to Jesus.  As we were walking in we saw Fr. Bob, and he stopped to chat with us.  Dulce doesn't know him well, and she was quite shy.  She never said a word, she just showed him her two fingers when he asked how old she is, and she frowned the entire time.  When we were walking away she told me, "I didn't make a smile for him, Mama."  It was such a cute way of saying it, that we make smiles.  She's right, we do get to make smiles or frowns.  And what a good gift it is to make a smile for someone!

We got into Adoration and we all knelt down and bowed to our Eucharistic Lord.  Pia headed over to a kneeler and quietly knelt the entire visit while Dulce wandered around and collected all of the rosaries.  When it was time to go, I said to Pia, "Tell Jesus bye and that you love him." and she said, "I already did, Mom."  Oh.  Good work Pia.

How we love Fr. H!

We visited a good friend today, and I'm so glad we did!  Our very beloved priest, Fr. H is always so kind to the kids and would give them lollipops after Mass.  They adore him, and he made it so much easier to take them to daily Mass because they were welcome and included and excited to be there.  Whenever he is back at the parish for confession they run up to him and nearly tackle him because they are so excited to see him.  I am so grateful to him.

Today was no exception, he was lovely.  He speaks very quietly but he is so interesting and funny.  He gave us all hugs and cookies, he told us all about his family and childhood.  We talked about the parish-he always finds good in everyone and every situation.  He is constantly cheerful. The girls sang him a song.  Pia did a back walk over for him.  He said, "Wow!  Do you want to see me do one of those?  No, that would be the end."  We all laughed.  He told me how lucky they are to have me as their mom (so kind, always so encouraging!).  When his next visitors arrived he introduced us to them and told them, "They are the treasure of St. E's (talking about my kids)."  Well, we think he is the treasure of St. E's!  It is so beautiful when you meet a holy priest, and they are so easy to love.  And we will be back to visit him very soon.